1. Mistaken identities
“What the f***”
Certainly this is not the best word to start your day with. But for us this was an appropriate expression uttered every day as routine.
“Seventh time this month, that to in a row. My mobile alarm sucks”
“Sure it does” Replied my roommate who, at that very moment, was busy playing counterstrike on the laptop. “You are running late for the class, as usual.”
“I am not any freaked up Einstein like you. Besides who cares for the damn lecture? Somebody will be making all the notes and all we’ll have to do is to mug up and vomit every bit of it on the answer sheet. By the way, do you know where I kept my pants yesterday?”
“They are on my bed. And please don’t keep your underwear on my bed.” Abhinav is quite serious when it comes to cleanliness. The last time I saw him in dirty clothes was when he came back from the football ground with dirt absorbed in every single bit of his t-shirt. That day he bathed thrice and cleaned his clothes till they are as good as new though this process took a whole night’s long time.
“ouuuww…kkkk…auyyy…..”I said while brushing my teeth. I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. I was looking rusty and my bulking eyebrows were clearly giving invitation to dreams.
“What time is it?”
“01:25”
“That means I have 4 minutes remaining. Cool isn’t it.”
“And you are supposed to take bath, dress up and take food in this big time gap. Does this seem cool to you?”
“I don’t think so. Can you give me my bag? It’s on your table.”
“Okay, wait a second. Here you go.” He said as he shot a perfect headshot in the game.
“What a shot dude. He didn’t even have a clue what hit him.”
“I think you should run for the class. Hurry up or you will be late. Professor Vera is very strict. If he gets hold of you, you are gone.”
Run: this is the only word in my dictionary which kicks the freaks out of me. To run for has become the part and parcel of my life now. But my instincts always favor the lazy side of me. I cared for good grades. I never participated in any extra-curricular activities. I never did anything which called for any nerve-bone coordination. But time always teaches me how to run. And god provided me the best tutors I could ever imagine.
My first tutor was my school bus driver who always used to reach the bus stop a minute before me daily and I had to run to catch it. Second was my neighbors’ dog that always chased me whenever I walked across the street to throw the trash. I used to run when I reached the railway station to catch the six o’clock local and saw it gaining pace right in front of my eyes. Though I got bruised and broke my leg once, years of practice has made me respect the place this word has in my life. Now it was my professor’s turn.
Abhinav was true. You got to be a rocket scientist to device a way out of this one. With two minutes to go and I had raced my way into the mess. The breakfast had begun but I had no time for public display of my table manners. I swiftly picked up whatever I could get hold of from the table. With a burger in one and notebook in the other I rushed out towards my goal, the lecture hall complex.
I started rattling my bag as soon as I finished the superfast breakfast.
“Pen…notebook….pencil….chewing gum... Wait a second, from where the hell that came from? Who cares?” I said as I popped it into my mouth. I felt my hands paining a bit. It must be the effect of last night. Last night we played badminton till five in the morning and when to sleep when we realized that it was not too dark after all.
Well there was a pair of hands that I never wanted to work fine. Those hands belonged to my wristwatch which very efficiently showed that now I was four minutes late for my class.
“The professor is going to kick me.” I murmured to myself.
The top view of my classroom at the lecture hall complex resembled a hexagon. With a blackboard on one of the wall and two doorways on the either sides of the wall facing them my class was situated at the main entrance of the complex.
As I reached the class I saw nearly everyone sitting and listening patiently to the daemon. I do not have any hard feelings for the professor. It’s just that the last few incidences we came across were no so joyous. Last week he caught me and Varun giving proxy for the same guy. Later he caught me again while I was trying to escape from the boring lecture. Again he caught me when I helped somebody runaway from the class. Today I did not wanted to add another incident in a not so cool list.
I sneaked in a few empty benches at the back and discovered that I might be able to reach the nearest row if the professor turns to the blackboard. I got a chance soon and I sneaked on my toes towards the closest bench. But one voice rose like an alarm in the air.
“Excuse me, sir. I think that there is something wrong in the solution.”
Curse me it was Saha.
The devil just rocked back towards Saha. What a reaction it was. This was not the first time I saw it but I was amazed to see that the whole class looked shocked as if the twin towers have fallen or a nuclear bomb has exploded. I was curious that the professor has spotted me or not.
“What is wrong in the explanation Saha?” The professor looked puzzled.
Arbind Saha is one of the most classic examples of our section’s wide diversity. This guy has problem in everything, be it from mathematics to theories of Plato. He is a true atheist (I say) and an irritating guy (everyone says). Every class we wait for Saha the great to rise up from his throne and raise the mighty voice of doubt and meaningless questions.
There was more than just one reason why everyone was annoyed with him. His doubts sometimes didn’t have earthly explanations. According to him having fun is against the moral rules of a good student. It was a fact that nobody ever saw Saha talking the other gender. I still don’t know whether Saha did not like to talk to girls or the girls stayed away from Saha.
But for now Saha was he villain of my dream to reach my destination and as the professor came towards the back benches and my tension rose that he might discover me. What started as a mathematical argument was turning out to be a very serious discussion. Neither Saha nor Professor Vera seemed to stop. The argument was raising the tension on many faces but I was the only one who was terrified. As usual the talk ended without any conclusion and Saha had o sit down silently with his chain reactions of queries.
But suddenly someone’s phone rang “dhoom machale” and the professor got distracted. This was my chance and I fluently jumped on to grab one seat nearby me. I was saved and Kalpana was ‘dhoomed’ as she got her share of the bitter words from the professor.
“Now who has solved the problem on the board?”
“What! The freak had given a problem to solve and in all this I did not even notice.” I murmured once again as I realized that mistakenly I brought Abhinav’s copy instead of mine in the class. But it was a blessing in disguise. He had solved the same problem in the class last week. It was easy for me to copy it down on a fresh paper now.
But the teacher thought otherwise.
“Boy in the red shirt. Yes, you at the back. Stand up and show me your copy.” Vera yelled out loud.
It was me.
“Yes sir I think I have solved it.” I said hesitantly offering the copy to him and praying that he does not see its cover.
“Very well, you solved the question correctly”
I was glad he didn’t notice.
“But wait; there is something you have done wrong”
I watched him as sweat poured by my eyebrows and I felt my throat wobble. Save my soul.
“You wrote the date wrong….today is tenth not seventh.”
I grabbed the copy back as soon as I saw the sign of satisfaction on the face of the professor. I took a sigh of relief.
