Zakhm

Main to boond tha sajoya,
main to sari raat soya,
sooraj ki halki roshani ne,
kuch waqt pehle jagaya,
phir jaane kha se kaise,
ek jhoka zor se jo meri daal ko yun cheda,
na jaane kab aur kaise main zameen pe aaya

abhi to main hara hun, abhi to main bhara hun,
bas thodi hi dur bikhra hua,
abhi uss ped se jhada hun.
har toote patte ki tarah meri bas ek hi aas hai,
aasman nahi to kewal ek daal ki pyaas hai,
pankh nahi to kewal ek sahare ki talash hai,
warna meri ye zindagi, bas ek sukhi laash hai.

AlpViram

Subah abhi hui nahi, kuch samay baaki hai,
Abhi to wo soya hai, jiski neend ab saaki hai,
zindagi ke nashe se choor hokar hokar jo soya hai,
thoda sa hansa tha, thoda sa roya hai,
aaj zara aur sone do use jisne ek sapna boya hai.

Abhi na jagao use, abhi na chedo use,
der tak jaaga tha wo, abhi to soya hai,
na jaane in gardishon mein kab se wo khoya hai,
thoda sa hansa kabhi, thoda sa roya hai,
maile pade apne chehre ko ansuon se dhoya hai,
muddaton baad usne,ek sapna sajoya hai,
aaj zara aur sone do use jisne ek sapna boya hai. 

A Heart-Hole : a small tale

"I hate hospitals."

Seriously, they make you feel more sick than you could ever imagine. Though a private hospital looks like the most cleanest place on the earth but its a fact that a hospital cradles high risk of contagious diseases. From the moment i entered the hospital that weird smile on the receptionist's face made me think over and again. As if her smile was was saying " Welcome sir. You are next. Prepare to get screwed for good."And believe it or not my toothache felt much worse than it normally did.

And what could I say about that long confusing walk along the hallway leading to the general ward. Man that place gives me creeps. People yelling, never ending visitors, smell of Dettol all over, the over efficient sweepers and the ever so uncomfortable Doctors running around. You know sometimes I look at these white apron-clad people I feel sorry for them that they visit this pain-in-the-a** place day in and day out, without any excuse, and to the problems of all those people who have some problem or the other.( I wonder if anyone comes back and thanks the doctor for their work). An here I was again with my basket of problems. Surely after paying the fat medical bills of my family, I think they owe some attention to me too. 

But hang on, the worse part is the patients. Sitting in the hospital I was waiting for the long queue of patients to end. I had a few "companions" in my previous "ventures". From broken limbs to running stomachs, i felt more and more miserable as each of them explained their quandaries and how-they-landed-here stories. Whether its the Aunty, who lives three blocks away from my house, suffering form loose motions or the salesman who broke his leg after he slipped on the doorsteps of Mr.Sharma's house, everyone had a not-to-do list for me to avoid such circumstances. They smiled when they told their silly moments of success of how they landed up here. They thought they warned me but instead they made me fear more and I could do nothing more than to console them. So I mostly ended up getting bored or devastated from the boring talks.

 I usually came for dental check-ups. But today something different awaited me. A small girl came from nowhere and sat next to me on the chairs. She slowly settled down with her yellow stuffed toy and she looked closely at my watch. I pretended I was not watching her as I allowed the kid to do whatever she wanted.
"Do you watch Pokemon or you like Mr.Bean" she asked me. I looked around and asked her  if she was talking to me, she nodded yes.
"But you didn't answer, Mr.bean or Pokemon?"she asked again.
"Pokemon, I guess" I saw the stuffed Pickatchu toy in her hand so I was kind of influenced.
"Me and my brother like Pikatchu and Vulpix. What's your favorite one?"
"Charrizard and Onyx, I guess." I said as I couldn't remember any more names.
"You know, Ash could capture an Onyx with his Vulpix" she exclaimed as I asked " Who is Ash?"
She said as she slapped her head and went loudly and said " The one who caught pokemon, how could you forget that?" I was guilty as a crook to her that instant as she shared as sweet smile with me moments later.
And then started a quarter hour conversation about the beasts and their special powers. I failed in front of the knowledge of the little one many times but i loved how she laughed at my every failure. It was so sweet.
She told how she could sing the Captain Planet theme song or the Shaktimaan  dialogues in the section called " Choti choti magar Moti Batein". She also told me about how much she dislikes the fat matron and the evening pills she is supposed to take and how they end up below her bed after her vomiting.
I asked " Why are you here, you look fine, aren't you?"
"You know these people around here are mad. I don't know why have caged me. They call me in a room and take Ghost-copies of my body(X-rays) and hang them on the white board. I asked my mother once but she is also confused. I tell you If she stays around here she would also god mad." and suddenly she asked "Are you mad Abhishek bhaiya?" and started laughing. I could barely control my laughter. This girl was a laugh riot no wonder they called her sick. Sometimes I would explain something to her and she would call me idiot or fool  explaining her version of the same story and laugh by herself as I made faces to react to her sweet criticism.
Suddenly I saw a nurse calling from a distance. " Come here" she said. She waved hands at us and soon as she saw me rising she called again "Not you, the little girl".
"I have to go now." She said and i nodded to agree.
As she started to leave i asked what her name was she replied "Ananya" and waved her hands to say goodbye. I was so pleased for the time which I spent with the little friend of mine.

 Later after my checkup I went around the ward to look around for her but couldn't find her. All of a sudden I saw the nurse who had called for her. She looked in a hurry as I asked the nurse about the about the girl.
"Which one..oh..Ananya...that poor girl suffers from ASD..Atrial septal defect"
"What's that?" I asked as it was a never heard term.
"A hole in the heart..the kid has hole in the heart and soon she would be operated somewhere in Delhi. Her parents came to fill up the necessary forms. She is being shifted from here to AIIMS, Delhi" She said and ran away as the doctor called for her.
I could say anything. Poor child. I wondered many times how could a child suffer from this. Even imagining the childhood of the girl gave me shivers. I looked around at people moaning and stuffed in plasters and now I could see their hope of being healthy and free. I could feel the freedom and the blessing as I was able to walk as a much more healthy person than many more around me. I was feeling a supernal blessing and I prayed for the others around me.This time as I walked away from the hospital I didn't utter a single word.
Suddenly the respect for the place had grew many-folds. As now it had become a sacred place where hope lies for the ones who need it most.

Salaam Mumbai ( the cry of the autowala)

They say I do not belong here,
They come and beat me anywhere,
Whether I lie along streets, homeless and alone,
Tired of sweating for every penny I own,
The come,ramp and burn,and destroy,
Nobody is there to here me cry,
When the cameras shoot and the police don't pry,
As the khakis and media have rules to adhere,
They show me that I do not belong here.


When I came here in the city of dreams,
in the midst of people, I was lost in screams,
learned to work for a living and never complain,
I took what was offered and  overlooked the disdain,
when I conquered troubles as trifles and incurred some pain,
either lost in the darkness in the city of hopes,
I was building my dreams on the sundry layers,
and now they tell me I do not belong here.

I offered my service,my sweat,my blood,
When these Babus took decisions and hatred flood,
they took away or burnt every bit I earned,
hurt and burnt I cried lying in despair,
outcasted by those who have my language to compare,
 As now still they say I do not belong here.

P.S This post is dedicated to those ruthless people who plunder the hopes of millions who strive on their hard earned daily wages. They burn their autos and shops just to create chaos and the one on the throne just glib rubbish around. Seriously its time that the MNS workers in Maharastra stop doing these acts of cruelty on the name of social service. May Goddess Durga bless these dumbos with some brains and the autowalas with hope and bestow some fortune on them.

IN DEPENDANCE

IN DEPENDANCE

Fascinating isn’t it, the way we can look at this word. When read as two different words it conveys a meaning as being in “the state of relying on or being controlled by someone or something else”. On the contrary we all know the meaning if we combine both the words. 

Today on this patriotic occasion, I feel quite happy for the 1.2 billion people around the nation and salute the martyrs who made this day possible. 

But apart from all the celebrations around do you feel any guilt inside you? Yes, I am talking to you. Do you feel any guilt?

Let me clarify, I give you a set of examples 

1. Do you feel sad when you see any poor child around your neighbourhood?
2. Do you feel sad when you see children younger than your age working at Dhabas or as a street hawker?
3. Do you get disturbed when any disabled comes to you for any financial help(begging for alms) in trains or bus stands or even outside big temples?
4. Do you feel bad about the farmers committing suicide due to starvation?

I think these many examples are enough to invoke the idea inside your mind. And believe me, though it has and will be repeated a billion times in the future, ‘this was not the INDIA which the freedom fighters had dreamt for us. On a lighter note, “These are dark times there is no denying”. 

So, are we slaves? I think we are. We are slaves to corruption, poverty, female homicide, scandals and inflation. But more than any of these we are slaves to ourselves. Luckily, we don’t need a national movement to change ourselves. But we need a bigger force on our side, our own willpower, with a pinch of inspiration and a touch of enthusiasm.

As Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple spoke in one of his famous speeches at Stanford University on June 12, 2005 for the graduation commencement.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

And believe me we can make a change in the ever changing world. Speak what you think is right, express your thoughts. Let’s not make it freedom for the ‘free-dumb’. Learn to be free and make everyone aware. And soon you would be free from every guilt inside your heart and that day every day of your life will be celebrated as “INDEPENDENCE DAY”. 

I leave you with these eternal words of wisdom by beloved BAPU.

THE COLOURS OF LIFE

A little of blue as the dreams are led,

As the life that hangs on the thread,

Swerves around to different lane today,

As the colours flow, joy is bred.

As the yellow mists over the sky,

As the green faces passing by,

Music encored as the crowd goes wild,

A shower of red is all what it needed to fly.

With some splashes on the face,

Arose an utterly splendid chase,

To make others wet in the shower of love,

As the joyous and the merry embrace.

Cherish your present and colour tomorrow,

As time is the thing you can never borrow,

Its to easy to lose, to divide and hide,

But for once fill colors in your soul’s hollow.

A colour for love, a colour for care,

A colour for hope sheds patches of despair,

A colour for blessings, a colour for smiles,

A colour of dream to make you dare,

As the festival of color will always tell,

Life is always HOLI in a nutshell.

Its not just Christmas

From one cell to another cell,

One to converse, the other to dwell,

life gone material as one becomes plastic,

tastes,opinions and thoughts have grown elastic.

The inner sanctums now in dismay,

As the satan lurks for its pray,

The frail, the timid, who hide in the shadows

As if the Satan won’t have his day.

No doubt we sail on a freaking ship,

With unmanned wheels, on the mast we stand,

Vexed by desire, acquainted to fear,

And eyes now look for an inch of land,

Where the anchor of faith can be based,

As the tides are high and resouces effaced,

drooling on past and future presaged,

in the hands of you we lie caged.

You know we lost track of the cause,

We stripped and sacked without a pause,

Above all rules and the laws,

its your raven who guides and caws.

The order by which humanity survives,

As bees in a tangled and lumping hive

Its not just on christmas by the way,

That all the ones out here will pray,

For a future of all even,

We pray for peace and prosperity within.

Amen.